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I'm Back (A Dinosaur's Story)

from Bear Maximum by TV's Kyle

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Oh man! I haven't posted a FuMP since May! I've got a good excuse, though. Check it out.

lyrics

Hi there, folks, it’s TV’s Kyle
I know that it’s been quite a while
since you have seen my mutton-chopped face.

Now let me tell you listeners
I understand you’ve been concerned,
but I’ve been to a far-away place.

A pterodactyl, suddenly,
made its existence known to me
and motioned for me to climb ‘twixt his wings.

And while the land that I did find
was ostensibly before time
I’ve returned ‘fore they got to 14.

I’m back! It’s a dinosaur’s story.
I’m back! I was destined for glory!
I’m back! It was so dinosaury
That Spielberg would eat his dumb hat.

I’m back! It’s a dino-dimension.
I’m back! There was ne’er any tension.
In fact, we were partying hardy.
It don’t get no better than that!

I met an ankylosaurus
and I quickly named him “Morris”
I drew faces on the plates of his back.

I met a rad diplodocus
who had a rad methodicus.
His tail made a fantastic whip crack.

I partied with Deinonychus
His talons causing quite the fuss
And stegosaurus’ spikes thrilled the crowd.

Then via flying limousine
those prehistoric dance machines
Went to a dance club over the clouds!

I’m back! It’s a dinosaur’s story.
I’m back! I was destined for glory!
I’m back! It was so dinosaury
That Spielberg would eat his dumb hat.

I’m back! It’s a dino-dimension.
I’m back! There was ne’er any tension.
In fact, we were partying hardy.
It don’t get no better than that!

I have some information that might cause some consternation
especially if your age is over 30.
See, I had an observation that I saw on my vacation
that dinos have in common with the birdies.
They have feathers! They have feathers!
Yes, my dino bros had feathers!
I know that this will bother some of you.
But science won’t deny us what I spied with my li’l eye-us.
They’ve got feathers just like all the birdies do! Sorry guyz!

I’m back! It’s a dinosaur’s story. (It’s a story of the dinosaurs.)
I’m back! I was destined for glory! (He partied with them and nothing more.)
I’m back! It was so dinosaury (As a story it was quite a snore.)
That Crichton would dance in his grave!

I’m back! It’s a dino-dimension. (Then, I guess he danced with them I guess.)
I’m back! There was ne’er any tension. (Bridge was about birds. It was a mess.)
In fact, we were partying hardy. (Think I’m gonna leave ‘cause I’m depressed.)
We just didn’t want to behave!

credits

from Bear Maximum, released June 4, 2015

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TV's Kyle Burbank, California

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