You’re standing up and it’s driving me crazy
I’ve tried for hours to not let it phase me, but
Dennis, sit down
Dennis, sit down
Dennis, sit down

You’re driving me mad with all that standing!
I don’t mean to sound demanding, but
Dennis, sit down
Dennis, sit down
Dennis, sit down

I’ve tried asking nice.
I’ve tried asking twice.
Shall I ask you thrice?
Or use a make-you-sit device?

Did you somehow stand up taller?
You’re about to make me holler!
Dennis, sit down
Dennis, sit down
Dennis, sit down

Did you just duplicate to deny me?
Your four feet on the floor defy me!
Dennises, sit down
Dennises, sit down
Dennises, sit down

Now that is some introduction
to your special brand of destruction.
Asexual reproduction?!
Cease your Dennises production.

They’re twenty of you, all of them upright
I don’t want to seem real uptight, but
Dennises, sit down
Dennises, sit down
Dennises, sit down

I’m gonna release the Dennis-eaters
I keep them in the basement with the water heater.
Dennises, sit down
Dennises, sit down
Dennises, sit down

Y’all had better sit down

‘Cause they’re looking very hungry.
Yes they’re hungry, hungry, hungry.
Better sit ‘cause they look hungry.

*sit noise*

THERE we go. Ok, Dennis-eaters. Back in the basement with ya.

(Disappointed Dennis-eater sounds)